My Fascination

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          Years ago, I could have never named who I had a fascination for because I had not yet truly understood the gravity of that feeling. That feeling came later, in the form of my first child.  Jesse, now 8 years old, has captivated me from the time that I first met him.

            Jesse has always been different, but in the most miraculous of ways.  He has always had knowledge that goes far beyond his short time on this Earth, and he has always had an understanding past the “normal” child of his age.  The eyes that Jesse sees the world from remind me so much of myself.  I can’t help but to observe in amazement Jesse’s strong opinions and belief system.

Jesse has a heart that could stop time.  He has empathy for even the smallest of creatures, and he feels emotions like lightning.  I harbor these feelings myself, and I sympathize with his inability to “shake” how passionately he views life.

Jesse’s creativity can best be described as random.  He has a vivid imagination, as he loves to read.  This transforms into the oddest of scenarios and draws him to abnormal interests.  I adore him for this as well; I’ve always believed the more random, the better!

I suppose that my fascination with Jesse is that he seems to be such a large portion of myself, walking around outside my body.  I can relate to this little human so well, in forms that I thought made myself so unique.  I stand in awe each and every day as I watch Jesse grow.  He is someone that I could have never imagined, but someone who turned out so perfect anyway.  Through all that I have been through with him, I can still say that mothering Jesse is the most important thing I have ever done in my life.  This boy will change the world someday, and I will be right behind him…with endless fascination.

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